enquanto houver couves

Marvin, o robot de "The Hitchhiker's guide to the Galaxy", é provavelmente uma das personagens mais deprimentemente hilariantes que já tive a honra de ler. É aquele tipo de personagem que, por mais que alguém tente animá-lo, dar-lhe uma perspectiva de vida que seja positiva, apenas consegue arrancar-lhe uma resposta demolidora. Aconselho-vos vivamente a leitura.

Algumas das suas tiradas:

• "I ache, therefore I am."
• "Do you want me to sit in a corner and rust or just fall apart where I'm standing?"
• "Pardon me for breathing, which I never do anyway so I don't know why I bother to say it, oh God, I'm so depressed. Here's another one of those self-satisfied doors. Life! Don't talk to me about life."
• "Life," said Marvin dolefully, "loathe it or ignore it, you can't like it."
• "Simple. I got very bored and depressed, so I went and plugged myself in to its external computer feed. I talked to the computer at great length and explained my view of the Universe to it," said Marvin."And what happened?" pressed Ford."It committed suicide."
• Sobre ter sido abandonado num parque de estacionamento durante 500 milhões de anos: "The first ten million years were the worst. And the second ten million years, they were the worst too. The third ten million years I didn't enjoy at all. After that I went into sort of a decline"
• "Why should I want to make anything up? Life's bad enough as it is without trying to invent any more of it"
• Arthur: "Marvin, any ideas?"Marvin: "I have a million ideas. They all point to certain death."
• Marvin: "I am at a rough estimate thirty billion times more intelligent than you. Let me give you an example. Think of a number, any number."Zem: "Er, five."Marvin: "Wrong. You see?"
• "Why stop now just when I'm hating it?"
• "I think you ought to know I'm feeling very depressed"